Friday, 24 June 2011

Lesson of the Week: Taking a Back Seat


Sometimes in life you need to step away from the problem or situation that's bothering you and take a back seat. Let fate, destiny or whatever you want to call it do it's job. If you're stressed out over a situation there's NO WAY you're going to think clearly and make the right decisions. But by looking at it from another perspective the solution will eventually be known to you.

Let's take an example, you have a boyfriend and you begin to hear rumours that he cheated on you. Straight away you get these intense emotions, sadness, distrust and sometimes anger. What do you do? You text or phone your guy and start yelling at him down the phone. What will this solve? Nothing, in this situation had you stepped back and looked at it from someone else's perspective, a strangers lets say, you wouldn't have yelled at him. First think to yourself, is the person telling you the rumours trustworthy? Do they know you, or are they jealous of you? It hurts when you hear rumours, no matter who they're from, and that often causes us to forget the obvious and jump to conclusions. Secondly ask yourself how well you know your boyfriend, quite well or not at all? Just because you don't know him that well doesn't mean he cheated, it will just be harder for you to suss. Finally, remain on that back seat for a while, are the rumours dying down? If so then that's probably all it ever was. If it's not then it's time to speak calmly to your boyfriend, remember to keep looking at it from a strangers perspective, and don't let your emotions make any decisions.

I'm glad I learnt this lesson in my life, and I do wish that I could use this method for every sticky situation but it takes practice and a lot of self control to be able to remove yourself from something and leave until it calms down. If you've managed to do this then well done, if not don't worry because it takes time. But when you do it will feel amazing and you'll feel less guilty because you won't have done or said anything in the spur of the moment!


P.S. These particular lyrics from one of my favourite songs help me stay mellow and calm.

I will not bow, I will not break.
I will shove the world away.
I will not fall, I will not fade.
I will take your breath away.

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